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雅思作文批改5.5分:整体错误少,但词汇和句型单一

  • 2018-08-14     
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  背诵范文,积累常规的写作模板,词汇量和写作句型句式是雅思写作取得高分的必要因素。备考过程中发现自己的长短处,针对性攻克,高分就不远啦。今天继续分享关于雅思作文批改范文。

  作文题目:

  It is said that the best way to solve the world’s environment problems is to increase the price of fuel. To what extent do you agree or disagree. What other measures do you think might be effective?

  作文内容:

  Nowadays, the environmental problems have attracted more attentions. Some suggest that increasing the fuel price is the best method to solve these issues. In my opinion, high fuel cost is a useful way, but not the best way,to[b1] deal with the these problems.

  Definitely, the increase in fuel pricemake [b2]people reduce the usage of vehicle, which can exhaust carbon dioxide and cause air pollution. For example, many people will not choose driving a car when they can reach someplace by cheaper transportation, since they can’t afford the high price of petrol. In this way, there are few toxic gases produced, which can help solve environment problems in some extent.

  On the other hand, the high fuel cost is not useful to those wealthy people, who use vehicle more frequent and cause more air pollution than ordinary people. In this case, this method also can sharpen the contradictions and widen the gap between differentsocial stratum[b3]. Hence, although increasing fuel price is able to solve environmental problems, it may cause political and economic crisis at the same time.

  In my opinion, government can levy tax on the overuse of fuel. I mean that everyone should have a limited quantity in the fuel, if they exceed the limit, they should pay more money to use it, or even they should do some works associated with protecting environment.

  In conclusion, increasing the price of fuel is a way to solve the environmental problems, but we still need to take more effective measures, such as overusing tax, to deal with these problems.

  [b1]逗号删除

  [b2]Makes 这里是 [b2]increase做主语,谓语使用单数

  [b3]social stratum[b3]s

  预估分数:5.5

  总体点评:

  文章结构内容完整,符合题目要求,讨论了自己的观点和建议措施,每段的观点都有详细的展开。

  语言方面,有较少的语法错误,注意写作的时候,主谓要保持一致,但是整体词汇和句型使用比较单一,建议在平时的练习中可以尽量灵活多变一些。

微信图片_20180814191026.jpg

  以上就是小编为大家介绍的关于雅思作文批改范文。更多雅思听力技巧、雅思报名流程等问题,可以咨询我们。

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